Resident Evil 4 – Masterpiece in gaming.

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The greatest Gamecube game released was Resident Evil 4. It was also one of the greatest games ever released and was the best Resident Evil game, by a fucking mile.

Here we are with a Nintendo Gamecube, a cute little system way ahead of it’s time. Suddenly, a Resident Evil comes out. What could I expect from a Gamecube game? That little midget disc couldn’t possibly contain an epic game, right? Wrong! The Gamecube actually had several great games but there wasn’t any near the heights of Resident Evil 4.

See, for years, Resident Evil games had sucked dinky. Problem was, they were also scary as fuck and the universe was fun – zombies. It sort of set the trend in many ways for the zombie infatuation we have in 2015. But the first few games had blown!

Resident Evil 1 – Was fun for its time but sucked really, when you think about it. Controls were awful, camera angles fucked you constantly and there wasn’t any ammo. I loved it, but my friends wouldn’t play it.

Resident Evil 2 – Really had nothing to do with a residence. Same exact style of play as 1 (shitty). Once again, I loved it but my friends hated it. It introduced the idea of a second playthrough affected by the first characters experience. So they immediately scrapped that for

Resident Evil 3 – Shit game and one I never got into. I might go back to it someday but I probably won’t. Half the game Resident Evil 2 was, same exact (or worse) graphics, uninspired story taking every element from the 2nd game possible, except the main character.

Resident Evil Code Veronica – Actually made a few improvements but it was for the Dreamcast. Later released for the PS2, it felt like a cheap ass Dreamcast port to me and always had Sega’s stain on it. I have it on my PS3 to this day and it is sort of like the immigrant in the South amongst all the other games. It knows it, too.

Resident Evil Outbreak – It was online and it was a bad ass concept, allowing people to play together with others, but unfortunately, online sucked in this era and so did most online games. You never could get the shit going right with 3 other people and you needed everyone on their shit for this game to work.

Then around this time, we get Resident Evil 4. I was pretty fatigued but it was for a system I had bought and literally played nothing on, so I went for it. What I found was amazing. AMAZING I SAID.

The plot is simple. You are Leon Kennedy, from Resident Evil 2 but in a far less cartoony outfit. You are looking for the President’s daughter who was kidnapped. Yes, I know it wouldn’t work like this really but hey we’re playing a game so I give them a little latitude. While investigating a town in Spain, I think, you suddenly get attacked by Los Plagas. A bunch of dirty villagers who can’t not stink like anus are being mind controlled by bug things and you have to battle through them, all the way to the boss who is like Emperor Palpatine. You also have to fight a midget.

The game is scary, all the while. A shitty village with houses (YES! It is once again featuring of RESIDENCES), a mining facility, a castle, some archeological ruins…its fucking got to be one of the best settings for a videogame, overall, that was done.

Now, unlike previous Resident Evil games, this one said FUCK shitty camera angles and gave you an over-the-shoulder view, third person. It was GREAT. Also, you aimed by using a laser pointer on the gun. Also – great. They still managed to keep the scary element we knew and loved AND brought gaming to the modern day.

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Also, unlike other RE games, you had to protect and escort an annoying girl named Ashley. She had huge jiggle tits. Also, you could look up her skirt and she would get pissed off at you! My cousin told me about that. He’s a perv.

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The game also features wickedly detailed upgradable weapons and a virtual armory of explosives, guns, knives and yes, a rocket launcher. Welcome Stranger! You are afforded far more inventory space than in previous games, to prevent the constant need for backtracking (not fun). Also, this level of detail is expanded upon with New Game PLUS. Oh yeah. I played through 7 or 8 games on Normal and at least as many on Hard. Once, I even played through on hard without saving once to beat the game in one setting without dying. I was tired by the time I got to Krauser though, and he fucking killed me.

Resident Evil 4 also had a Mercenaries mode for endless fun and allowed you to play as characters not even in the game. Hunk, Krauser, Wesker and all other varieties of characters were featured. It was a blast.

The game was amazing. Resident Evil 4 featured very few flaws with a strong story, incredible graphics (for the time, which still look nice) and gameplay that was revolutionary. It actually gets the INSANELY RARE AnnoyedCritic.com 10/10 score. The perfect game.

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