Review: The Dentist

TheDentist

The Dentist is one of those movies that used to come on every night in the 90s on HBO or Cinemax. I guess it had low costs to air but it inadvertently became legendary. It was sort of a gentle horror movie that I, as a child, loved.

So Dentist is an obsessive guy. He wants everything right and when it isn’t, he’s furious with all of us. Who does that sound like to you? (God). He catches his wife sucking the dick of the dirty pool boy! He kills a dog.

Dentist loses his mind. He fantasizes about killing. Feels like he begins the process of becoming insane.

Mark Ruffalo shows up in the dentist office!!! We wouldn’t like him when he’s angry. We won’t like Dentist even more.

Holy shit Dr Silverman from the Terminator Universe shows up!! What’s he doing here!? He’s an IRS agent. Dentist gets punched for choking Marilyn Monroe patient.

His wife shows up to the office because he thinks they’ll be late for reservations. Even though the Dentist said he would surprise her later. He fucks her up. Then he lays her by the pool and the pool boy finds her tongue and wakes her up. He slashes the pool guy up.

Dentist ends up losing it, just completely. He kills a couple of coworkers, unhinges Dr. Silverman’s jaw and then chases brace-face around the office for half an hour. It actually seems like the end of the movie is happening but it isn’t.

Dentist takes a job at a dental school and orders his students to extract all the teeth. Then he pulls a gun out. Just then, the cops show up. Now, did he get the job and work there for months and the cops just happened to find him right as he snapped? We don’t know. But Dentist goes into a psych ward and his wife tortures him or maybe he thinks she does but is hallucinating? That must be it. Anyway, the movie ends in a little creepiness.

Hey, it wasn’t a great film, don’t get me wrong – but it has its charm and fun. It is quite ignorant and is very light and not too serious on itself. It is also vulgar and we see some tits. I’ll give it a 5/10. That’s pretty generous from me. Fuck you

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