Saved By the Bell – Episode 1 – Summer Love

saved

I never liked this junk show. Someone bumps into an extra on accident. Screech falls and it’s morbidly fake. Everyone appears out of no where like they’re out of the lockers on you can’t do that on television. The laugh track is used too much (once).

Lady takes off her enormous Hubble lenses and has them back on and off like 70 times. Not much continuity. Zach covers his boner.

Screech is not funny at all. He thinks he’s tough because he knocked out little Danny Bonaduce. I hate straws. Lady takes her glasses off every scene. People are drinking those old shitty bulb drinks that had grape or orange and burned the back of your throat. The ones that were like 50 for a dollar.

Lady takes her glasses off again. Everyone is ugly.

Lady takes a pie out of the oven with one pie holder and one bare hand. Doesn’t scald her. She appears on speed for a few.

The pants in this episode on women are up to their neck. Like if your pubes are above your belly button fine otherwise NO.

So we’re watching old people eat dinner together now. Admiral Ross from Deep Space Nine shows up and he’s young. Zach shows up wearing a sweater thick enough to make me sweat thinking about it. Looks stab proof. Admiral Ross gets jealous of the kid and leaves. He lies about being a doctor.

The show ends with a student in a teachers house, eating her pie. I bet they fucked.

I really am glad I hated this show as a kid. Hate well placed.

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