Stranger Things got boring for me.

stranger-things

While it began strong and had me hooked early on, Stranger Things quickly became tedious. The ending was pretty expected and cheeseball. I didn’t like it and let me tell you, I’ve drank a bunch of Tequila.

So, the show starts out strong. Credit given. Four kids quickly become three and they ride around on bicycles being Dungeons and Dragons kids. Someone once told me “Don’t write kids, unless you’re talking about goats.” Well, guess what? I might be talking about goats here. You never know. So one of the four goats gets kidnapped by evil monster dimension.

A monster that looks like it might give really good blowjobs appears and sucks in stuff with his face. This is the primary villain for the show. Presumably, this creature is in normal human dimensions because of secret government testing done by a facility in town that has kidnapped CHILDREN ALRIGHT for a long time. It was in the news but nothing ever came of it and everyone doesn’t know about it unless researching it. Sounds about like bullshit writing.

So Winona Ryder is in this and she’s not shoplifting but she is getting on my nerves. She plays an overly dramatic mother who remains loyal to her son for being alive. She’s right but the weird and annoying part is, so many people are telling her to “Move on,” and “Accept he is dead,” and the best she can do is act like a lunatic. She also never thinks to get a video camera and record the lights spelling stuff out or a monster coming out of the wall. Just once and you’re rich, lady.

When the sheriff decides to stop being a stereotypical uninterested lazy law enforcer as often seen in these types of shows, he becomes pretty bad ass and goes around beating people up for information. It wasn’t expected for me and I liked it. My question is, was this guy Jesse James the bicycle guy? lol I’m just kidding, I know he does tricycles.

As the show progresses, we meet new characters. One of them is a 34 pound girl named Nancy, which was probably from the Elm Street movies. She lies ALL THE TIME like some girls I’ve dated. Couldn’t tell the fucking truth but thought no one would notice and when I did notice, thought I shouldn’t mention it. You ruined my Mexican food dinner with your lies!!!!

Besides Nancy and suave boyfriend who is an expected jerk (but redeems himself, expectedly) we get peeping tom/George McFly creep kid, who is supposed to be a hero for some reason. I always thought he looked like he stunk like vinegar piss. Oh, don’t forget about Nancy’s fat friend. I’m not sure they ever found her. The fucking monster probably broke its back when carrying her back into the netherworld. No joke though, that girl was ugly. How do you try out for the role of an ugly friend without knowing you’re ugly? Did they tell her, “Honey you’re the perfect fit!” and pretend she wasn’t hideous. That’s why you got the job. Fat cells and that man jaw.

Another girl is introduced and I could have SWORE she was a guy for the first two episodes. Eleven, or Elle, has superpowers and gets nosebleeds. As you might expect, she uses her powers too much and dies over it. Maybe. She might still be alive, depending on how shitty the writers on Season 2 of this are.

Eventually Nancy, her suave pompadour hair boyfriend and creepster decide to use an axe and gun to take on the netherrealm monster. How this doesn’t end up with them killed, I don’t know. It is pretty much a stretch.

Then, the three kids decide to fight the monster with the blossoming mouth and one uses a slingshot. The kids actually keep acting like this is a good idea and it isn’t. Running would be a good idea. I’d have been halfway home by the third shot. So ONLY because Elle uses her superpowers, a shot from the slingshot shoves the monster back against the chalkboard I think. Elle decides she needs to vaporize it at the expense of her life and she tells the little homely boy she kissed that she’s gotta go bye. He is all sad. I kid of expected it, though. I didn’t really enjoy the ending at all and was emotionally out of the show, by then.

They teased another season and I’m sure it’ll come, considering how much chatter this one has gotten, but besides a bunch of nods to the 1980s which are often vague but sometimes in your face, I don’t see a lot here. Maybe like a 5/10 show.

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2 thoughts on “Stranger Things got boring for me.”

  1. You and I area part of the few humans on this planet that do not like this show. I only made it to episode two. I was bored and thought the plot was stupid. Oh well.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. This show could have been a movie instead… oh my gosh was I bored, 5-10 minutes of intrigue per episode, the rest made me want to sleep. I’m an 80s kid I should’ve been thrilled by this.

      Like

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