Angel Soft toilet paper is worthless

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Angel Soft is the worst toilet paper (well, maybe besides whatever that sandpaper Walmart uses). It is neither angelic, nor soft.

I hate Angel Soft. I wish real angels would sue them for slandering their name and then the word soft would materialize and sue them too. Their toilet paper makes you think it’s bad ass by being affordable and having cool words on the front, but it is like wiping your ass with confetti.

Close up. Also, 2X 1% is still just a shitty 2%, so twice as strong means nothing.
Close up. Also, 2X 1% is still just a shitty 2%, so twice as strong means nothing.

I can’t wipe with Angel Soft without getting what my grandpa called “hurricane twists” all over my butt cheeks. You know, when the shit you took is more expensive than the toilet paper you’re wiping it with and it causes the TP to twist up.

I was looking at some Amazon reviews of it, which you can too at the link. Some of the comments:

“At one time, Angel Soft was good paper at a low price. Corporate mentality has now taken over. Having narrowed the roll to ribbon-like proportions, the company seems to have decided further narrowing should be put off while it concentrates on thinning the paper to near-transparency.”

“I usually use Charmin, but I wanted to try something that costs a little bit less.
I don’t save any money using this product over Charmin because I use more, also the rolls are extremely small.”

“This is the biggest rip off Ever.”

As you can tell by the comments, the Angel Soft execs recently decided to make it even cheaper to up their profits. Greed at it’s best.

Buy anything else or just grab some leaves.

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2 thoughts on “Angel Soft toilet paper is worthless”

  1. There is no soft toilet paper anymore in 2015. Ultra soft charming used to be soft, now it’s sandpaper, like ALL of the rest!! I’m ready to give up on using any toilet paper at all and just use wipes. At least my ass won’t be sore then. Freaking lying toilet paper companies! All of them!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am glad it isn’t just me. I always use wet wipes and haven’t bothered with toilet paper in years.

      BTW, I was shitting while writing each word of this reply.

      Like

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