Category Archives: Television

Stranger Things got boring for me.

stranger-things

While it began strong and had me hooked early on, Stranger Things quickly became tedious. The ending was pretty expected and cheeseball. I didn’t like it and let me tell you, I’ve drank a bunch of Tequila.

So, the show starts out strong. Credit given. Four kids quickly become three and they ride around on bicycles being Dungeons and Dragons kids. Someone once told me “Don’t write kids, unless you’re talking about goats.” Well, guess what? I might be talking about goats here. You never know. So one of the four goats gets kidnapped by evil monster dimension. Continue reading Stranger Things got boring for me.

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The Season 2 premiere of Gotham sucked.

Yeah, the most creative word they could come up with was "villains." Why not "bad guys"?
Yeah, the most creative word they could come up with was “villains.” Why not “bad guys”?

The new season of Gotham is here and it’s just as shitty as the last one, maybe worse.

Out of the gate, if you don’t know that the Joker guy is the red headed dude, you have the worst guessing in history. That said, I’d be mad if they DIDN’T make ginger into the Joker.

Gordon goes from being a street cop to unemployment back to detective in this episode. Somehow, none of it is interesting at all. The fat delusional king idiot at the beginning randomly encounters Gordon, too.

Continue reading The Season 2 premiere of Gotham sucked.

Storage Wars Texas is pure trash on TV

Look at the goddamn guy with the comedy nose and mustache. Look at the goddamn guy with the comedy nose and mustache.

Storage Wars Texas sucks as much as you’d think. No one on the show is someone I would SPEAK to in public. Pure trash.

It took all of 8 minutes for an Obama joke to happen.

There’s one guy that probably has 3 years left on his heart. He’s huge.

There was like $50 bucks profit made on this show. What a waste of time.

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Review: Catastrophe – Season 1

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Catastrophe is a new comedy show on Amazon Prime, yeah that thing you buy groceries with. It’s a primitive Netflix like service that hey, I won’t lie, kinda sucks next to Netflix. But it’s about good content in the end and holy shit, this show is AWESOME. Rob Something and lady british are FUNNY, but not in the kind of way that Big Bang Theory tries to be (1 joke every second). They know where they’re good and they prove it by doing a riskier, less joke formula but the jokes? They’re like golden eggs vs shitty white eggs.

Continue reading Review: Catastrophe – Season 1

Saved By the Bell – Episode 1 – Summer Love

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I never liked this junk show. Someone bumps into an extra on accident. Screech falls and it’s morbidly fake. Everyone appears out of no where like they’re out of the lockers on you can’t do that on television. The laugh track is used too much (once).

Continue reading Saved By the Bell – Episode 1 – Summer Love

WCW Uncensored 1997 was junk.

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WCW Uncensored PPVs have a history of sucking. How will this one stack up? The third annual event from Charleston, SC couldn’t be worse than the others or the first two shows of the year…right?

Continue reading WCW Uncensored 1997 was junk.

Review: Raw is War – March 2, 1998

Raw is War
Raw is War

Raw is back with actual wrestlers we want to see! Austin, HBK and Tyson. I hate the effect where they cut back and forth between DX walking out and their titantron. Makes me sick. WWF has a hand drawn logo at the entrance. HBK calls out Iron Mike Tyson. The glass breaks. Rattlesnake is out. Then Kane comes out and says he will kill Stone Cold tonight. Austin says JR makes him sick!! Me too. He says he will kill Kane back. Tyson arrives.

Continue reading Review: Raw is War – March 2, 1998

Fox Business needs to go OUT of business. It is HORRIBLE.

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I started watching Fox Business as early as I could. It didn’t launch everywhere but slowly, every cable outlet came to get it. I believe DirecTV had it earliest in my area and I checked it out. From the first day it has been on, it SUCKED and it sucks now.

Continue reading Fox Business needs to go OUT of business. It is HORRIBLE.

WCW SuperBRAWL VII (1997) was garbage.

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We open with Piper escaping from a jail cell – with a spotlight actually on him in the jail. He takes off running like you might expect someone who had hip surgery to run. He’s in his kilt. This is how we open the show just after Souled Out, maybe the worst WCW show up until then. Oh boy.

Continue reading WCW SuperBRAWL VII (1997) was garbage.

Review: Hell’s Kitchen – Season 6

Winner, Dave. Also, Gordon Ramsay in the background, bitching about a toothpick being a millimeter off.
Winner, Dave. Also, Gordon Ramsay in the background, bitching about a toothpick being a millimeter off.

Time for another season of Imaginary Place’s Kitchen. But here’s the thing about this season – it became one of the most famous or infamous, if you will. Reason? because of a guy/grit named Joseph, who decided to challenge Chef Ramsay to a fight. Because he ain’t no pussy.

Continue reading Review: Hell’s Kitchen – Season 6

Review: Raw is War – February 23, 1998

Raw is War
Raw is War

We join you two nights after our last Raw. Because USA COULDNT PUT A DOG SHOW ANYWHERE ELSE.

Continue reading Review: Raw is War – February 23, 1998

Marvel Daredevil on Netflix is fantastic.

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Marvel Daredevil is a really good show. High quality, strong actors and good story. The opening, while a little similar to Hannibal, is also pretty fun. Is that candle wax? What is that?

Continue reading Marvel Daredevil on Netflix is fantastic.

Review: Adam 12 – “Reed, the Dicks Have Their Job and We Have Ours.”

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Adam 12 was a show back in Moses time when cops never did anything wrong and we’re always good guys who got the job done. Oh that’s just how they were portrayed. Each episode is a lot like the formula for Dragnet. No surprise, Jack Webb made this show too.

The episode I will sample today is “Reed, the Dicks Have Their Job and We Have Ours.”

They manage to say “One Adam 12” so much per episode, you could do a drinking game with it. “I’m generally very calm and collected” says the lady who is acting like she isn’t. It’s a call to a fucking cat under a house. I’d shoot the lady.

Some vagrant flags down the cops to narc on a fight. They’re sure to harass him about his past drug habit to embarrass him before leaving. They find a dead body. They basically do nothing until the dicks appear.

A woman is beat up by her wife. The cops ask her to not press charges if he promises. He’s a drunk. The officer doesn’t have time to listen to it and makes her forgive him.

So they chase some people down and the bad guys jump out. They plant drugs on them. The rookie who was mad he didn’t get to investigate the stabbing earlier gets all happy now that he saw a little action. They see the dicks and of course, the stabbing is working them a bunch.

This show sucked.

Review: Goosebumps – Attack of the Jack O’ Lanterns

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Attack of the Jack O Lanterns is our next televised train wreck. Why does RL Stine not even try to catch the flying papers at the open? I think I saw a green pussy in the open collage.

Continue reading Review: Goosebumps – Attack of the Jack O’ Lanterns

Review: Raw Saturday Night – February 21, 1998

Raw is War
Raw is War

This edition of Raw is Saturday, not Monday night! I never understood why USA would preempt their number one show so we could watch a poodle jump through a loop and take a shit on astroturf.

Continue reading Review: Raw Saturday Night – February 21, 1998

Review: Raw is War – February 9, 1998

Raw is War
Raw is War

We open to a camera shaking and Sunny, as Marilyn Monroe, singing Happy Birthday to Mr Blassie. The attitude era and happy birthday opens the show. We recap last weeks episode.

Continue reading Review: Raw is War – February 9, 1998

The first season of Gotham sucked.

gotham

First season of Gotham sucked. I can’t believe the show is still on. I just watch it to see how bad it can be. It is like driving by a car wreck and having to look out of interest.

Continue reading The first season of Gotham sucked.

Review: Goosebumps – Vampire Breath

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Vampire Breath is our next episode because they ran out of episodes that didn’t sound like shit. This episode was so bad, it took me weeks to finish just this measly review of it. I couldn’t watch it. Every time I would start, I would get nauseous because of how bad of a waste of time it was. So just know, this fucking episode is one of the worst of the worst.

Continue reading Review: Goosebumps – Vampire Breath

Review: Arrow – Season 3

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The third season of Arrow was probably the best season it has produced thus far. If the show were to go off the air tomorrow, it would be a beautiful 3 year story that has been told. We know that isn’t going to happen but let us talk about this fantastic show.

Continue reading Review: Arrow – Season 3