Review of Star Wars: The Force Awakens (No Spoilers)

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Star Wars The Force Awakens fucking completely sucked. It wasn’t as awful as the prequels, which George Lucas should have been ran over…over….but the movie blew. However, you know me, your trustworthy Critic, and I will give you a spoiler-free review. Just click read more.

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Fahrenheit 9/11 was excellent.

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Fahrenheit 9/11 is a fantastic documentary by Michael Moore about all that went down during the Bush years, up until 2004.

George W. Bush absolutely stole the 2000 election. He sucked as President until 9/11* (still sucked after that, too, but a lot liked him).

Almost all private flights out of the country were grounded on 9/11. The Bin Laden family received White House approval to fly out AFTER the attacks.

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Man of Steel was awful!

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Man of Steel wasn’t worth a shit and I love Superman movies. It made no sense throughout. No sense.

Zod is destroying the planet but wants to take it over with about 3 hours left for the planet to survive. No logic.

Zod kills Jorel, walks out and doesn’t even act like he cares about the ship that is blasting off with the entire codex of his species. He’s like “Oh yeah shoot it.” SHOOT IT? It has your fucking species in it, shouldn’t you capture it? Zod is arrested and put on trial while the planet dies. They basically save his life because he killed them.

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Rambo: First Blood is what cops are really like.

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A guy minding his own business. A fucking prick cop. Guy gets arrested because he doesn’t suck the cops ass. That’s reality folks. In Rambo, however, the guy blows the shit out of the entire town, beats up the entire police force, whispers in their ears sweet nothings (and that he could have killed them), survives a rocket launcher and lives just because his Colonel came in and asked him to please stop destroying everyone.

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Vacation is an alright movie.

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I really didn’t know what to expect with the 2015 Vacation movie but I am happy with what they did. The movie is adult humor at an above average level. It wasn’t endless laughs but it is worth watching if you’re a fan of the series.

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