Review: Goosebumps – You Can’t Scare Me!

It was probably the most boring looking GB book and was never checked out of the library.

It was probably the most boring looking GB book and was never checked out of the library.

You can’t Scare Me is our next Goosebumps TV episode. These shows had the same budget as this post.

So some stupid girl is playing in a swamp and her idiot grandpa tried saving her lost ball. Just as a shit monster appears. But it was just a scary story a little girl told.

A kid apparently has a snake just in his pocket and puts it in storyteller Courtney’s bag. But she shares her food with a teacher and he pulls a BLUE rubber snake out. When they put the live snake in the shot, it’s orange. Just awful.

An idiot washes a van with muddy water. I’d fire him. Courtney is kissing major ass and asks for a grade higher than an A +. The jealous boys are stalking her.

The boys hatch a plan to get her. They cover one of them in mud. they could have just used the Pokemon Muk.

Muuuuuuuuk!

Muuuuuuuuk!

But while waiting on Courtney at the swamp, they find the real shit monster! The kid runs in a 3 frames per second special effect, like Rescue 911 or something.

It’s actually snowing in some shots. I bet the kid with the mud on him is in agony because of the cold. Courtney shows up and the monster prepares to kill her, but she talks him to sleep! She actually discovers the monster for the news.

The monster comes back to life and puts a gentle hand on the shoulder of one of the boys, scaring them even though he’s already proven his harmlessness. Weird episode.

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