Tag Archives: star wars

Rogue One: A Star Wars Story gave me depression

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Obviously, I spoil the movie in the review but the fact is, I think Disney spoiled the movie by releasing it. This movie wasn’t good, except for the scene at the end with Dark Helmet.

So the movie begins by making me think a Star Destroyer is swooping in but it was actually a triangular shape of a dust ring. Then some stuff takes place. We meet our main characters and they’re absolute boredom. The only character with any personality is the droid. I can’t tell you what any of their names were (including the droid). Continue reading Rogue One: A Star Wars Story gave me depression

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Review of Star Wars: The Force Awakens (No Spoilers)

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Star Wars The Force Awakens fucking completely sucked. It wasn’t as awful as the prequels, which George Lucas should have been ran over…over….but the movie blew. However, you know me, your trustworthy Critic, and I will give you a spoiler-free review. Just click read more.

Continue reading Review of Star Wars: The Force Awakens (No Spoilers)

Star Wars Commander sucks and has the worst A.I. possible

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The Star Wars Commander game for tablets and phones sucks. It sounds like a great game until you play it and your AT-AT shoots 15 wall-segments in a single-file line, for no reason.

Continue reading Star Wars Commander sucks and has the worst A.I. possible

Review: The Empire Strikes Back

Star Wars - The Empire Strikes Back (1980) Style B by Tom Jung

Star Wars fans drool all over Empire Strikes Back. Fact is, I like it more than the rest of the movies put together, mainly because it relies on story instead of insane world-destruction to stay busy…but when you sit down and watch it, there is a lot about it that is horrible.

Continue reading Review: The Empire Strikes Back