Batman Arkham Knight is the next-gen Rocksteady conclusion do the Arkham series…or so we are led to believe. Anyway, the game is pretty fun but has a lot of technical problems that only I, the Riddler…I mean, the Critic can do justice to in an article.

27 pound Batmobile. The fucking car slides and flies after you hit a soda can. This car should be gripping the ground but no, it’s lighter than fuck.

Buttons not working. Sometimes, you’ll hit counter in a fight and it just won’t counter it. Most of the time, this never occurs. However, there are times where you tap it and you’ll just stand still for a punch.

Not being able to jump over rails when you tap X X by it. Batman will sometimes just do an in-place physics defying dive into a rail instead of jumping over it. He does this with the winch cable too.

Game taking control from you when enemies are about to shoot and not letting you do what you want. Sometimes it doesn’t let you do ANYTHING.

Random destination grappling. You shoot that grappling hook and you might end up in Metropolis.

Fucking awful camera angles when changing directions. Especially in a fight. Also when driving. Also when playing Arkham Knight. The camera loves getting stuck behind stupid shit or aiming down at you from the side enemies are coming from. I don’t have time to direct the goddamn game and play the main character at the same time.

Loading times that I wish were less but I guess I can’t complain much about

One mile per out grapples. This fucking grappling hook is faster

Batman moves at 88 miles per hour through the grates under the floor and fucking misses openings to go in, making you go back and forth over it like a cheese grater.

Stuck on everything. You get stuck on everything when trying to stealth-move around.

Once again another video game that doesn’t fucking take into account the amount of shit the camera will get stuck on or move in direct view

I’ve hit buttons when the prompt was on the screen and nothing happened

The immobilizer and its locking on mechanism fucking suck. I HATE THE IMMOBILIZER ROCKSTEADY. Probably my least favorite part of the game. This shit wont even lock on when they’re square in front of you. It’ll take forever to shoot and lock on and it just blows dicks.

Did Rocksteady seriously think anyone would get used to SQUARE as brake? If R2 is accelerate, L2 should be brake.

I cannot believe how inaccurate the Vulcan cannon is. It’s shameful. I don’t think the upgrade for its accuracy helps at all. These games don’t capture mini guns at all well

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I may update this page with more. If I do, i’ll be below this line. Check back.

Expect a full review of the game later. It’ll be rated well, don’t get me wrong. But we don’t suck game dev ass around here.